Get Rid of Your Weird Stuff
This is not a statement piece, this is a threat to everyone who enters your home. Do you need to have a giant porcelain statue in your living room? You could just as easily throw a plant down where Jar Jar Binks used to stand and people will start to consider hanging out with you again.
Committing to Weirdness
Having insane statement pieces in your house actually doesn't make people seem more interesting. Highlight your space with your personality, not your belongings. You yourself are the most important statement piece in your home, and any other ridiculous artifact you have detracts from your personality.